You will find many mathematical games [ here ].

Q: What does an employed mathematician say to the unemployed mathematician?

A: "Do you want fries with that?"

One student asks another:

- What will be your average grade in this semester?

- As usual: between *e* and *pi*.

Q: What is a *derivative of a party*?

A: It's the amount of alcohol that you can buy when you sell the empty bottles after the party.

Q: And when can you say that the party was really good?

A: When the second derivative is poistive as well.

The **Local Genius Theorem**: For every mathematician there exists a surrounding in which he is the most ingenious one.

An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first mathematician asks for one beer. The second mathematician asks for 0.5 beer, the next one asks for 1/4 beer and so on. But the bar-tender just smiles and pours them two beers...

Mathematicians never die - they only lose some of their functions.

- What does the zero say to the eight?

- Nice belt!